Back off, boys

I am harumphing as I am left behind to work on my first world problems.

But it does remind me that National Eating Disorder Awareness Week is swiftly approaching and I am hoping to get my life sorted before then because I am taking part in some community awareness that I would LOVE for you to join in on.

NEDA Week is February 26- March 3 but I am a part of a pre-awareness campaign and will be speaking on February 9. Because I have absolutely zero computer skills, I just copied and pasted the text of the flyer below. Just another way that you can support those with eating disorders.

I remember when I went to hear a recovered anorexic speak when I was struggling with my eating disorder in high school. It wasn’t that I wanted help or even planned to get well, I was just curious on what it was like on the other side of things. I was wanting to know if it was worth it. Now I get to be that person that gets to tell them that it IS worth it. And so are they.

I am going to use this photo of me when I was a child. Every one deserves to smile when they look in the mirror.

In honour of eating disorders awareness week, 2012

FREE COMMUNITY EVENT

EATING DISorders: 

STORIES OF RECOVERY

February 9, 2012

at 7 P.M.

St. Andrew’s Church

54 Queen Street North (at Weber)

Kitchener

(Parking and entrance at rear of church)

Please join us in witnessing stories of recovery for persons who live with an eating disorder.  These courageous individuals will share their experiences, with personal insights on what worked best for their own recovery.  Family members will also talk about how to support a child or friend with an eating disorder.  Local treatment providers will be on hand to answer any questions.

Sponsored by EDAC (Eating Disorders Awareness Coalition of Waterloo Region) and Trellis Mental Health and Developmental Services Eating Disorders Program.

Every morning before the sun rises, I am either in a class room with some of the most intelligent eleventh graders I have ever met and discussing Macbeth, or doing laps in the pool with some girls from my cross country team.

I spend my days in class studying French, Chaucer, American Literature, and Shakespere. If I am not doing that, I am at my new job at Alternative’s Journal and I feel speechlessly blessed to be there. I am on the lowest rung of the publishing world as the intern, but I still work in a bright office with a city view and the essential Mac computer and have meetings with environment-loving academics.  This experiance is one of the most exciting and trying moments I have ever experianced because the bar of expectation is higher than it has ever been for me.

I am pouring my heart and soul into things that I love, but my #firstworldproblem complaint is that there are not enough hours in the day to fully immerse myself in what I do. I feel as if I am scratching the surface as I listen to a professor talk to me in Middle English or get 100 bits of essential hints about the writing world at work. 

So yes, I am working 15 hours days but I am loving every moment of it. Even though it feels like I am never going to survive this semester, I am forgetting there are only 24 hours in a day and sprinting full force through my days and trying to snatch up every amazing moment before it is gone.

I was so delighted to find them, I thought I would share them with everyone.

Recently, Paula Deen has admitted that she’s had Type II Diabetes for years. Accordingly, she’s putting out a cookbook of healthy food. Here are some excerpts!

FRUIT SALAD

INGREDIENTS:

1 lb. bag of Skittles

3 cups ranch dressing

DIRECTIONS:

Mix well. Serve room temperature.

-

PAULA’S BROWN RICE

INGREDIENTS:

1 pilaf white rice

1 bowl melted Junior Mints

DIRECTIONS:

Cover rice in chocolate. Serve with maple syrup to taste. To splurge, top with a sprinkle of sausage calzones.

-

SCRAMBLED EGG WHITES

INGREDIENTS:

1 dozen (12) Cadbury eggs

2 lbs. Frito crumbs

1 package extra-fat pork lard

1 pilaf Paula’s brown rice

DIRECTIONS:

Break the Cadbury eggs and harvest the crème-filled white centers. Dip them in the Frito crumbs. Put the lard (make SURE to get the extra-fat kind or it will be BLAND) in a frying pan on high heat, and fry the crème centers until golden-brown. Serve on a bed of Paula’s brown rice.

-

PAULA’S GARDEN BURGER

INGREDIENTS:

3 bags Olive Garden® Endless Breadsticks

12 Olive Garden® Stuffed Mushrooms

1 plate Olive Garden® New! Baked Pasta Romana with Chicken

4 Olive Garden® Black Tie Mousse Cakes

1 slice American cheese (optional)

DIRECTIONS:

Smash all of the Olive Garden® foods together until they resemble a large patty and top with cheese. For lowest calories, hold the cheese.

-

PAULA’S GUILT-FREE FAT-FREE® SMOOTHIE

INGREDIENTS:

34 lbs. sugar

DIRECTIONS:

Put sugar in smoothie glass and drink with straw, serve chilled in white wine tumblers or, for special occasions, lap from trough. This delicacy is guilt-free since you can make a conscious choice not to feel guilty about anything you put in your body like Paula does!

-

BUFFET AND A BURGER

INGREDIENTS:

1 burger

1 Las Vegas buffet

Christmas-themed elastic pants (optional)

DIRECTIONS:

Go to Las Vegas buffet. Make sure the buffet has burgers, or provide your own. Do NOT walk around the buffet. Get a motorized scooter, or stay in one spot and use a jaws of life to pick some of each buffet food out of the tubs and put it on your burger. Elastic pants are nice because your gupa (gunt-fupa) stays nicely inside the stretchy pants except for a few folds of fat with stretch marks that seep out of the pants.

-

PAULA’S GUILT-FREE® PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLIES

INGREDIENTS:

1 peanut

18 sticks of butter, mashed

1 pair Jellies shoes

DIRECTIONS:

Cover the shoes with butter and top with the peanut, and then eat the shoes. If you eat shoes it’s like you’re exercising so it’s VERY healthy.

-

PAULA’S GUILT-FREE® PIZZA PANTS

INGREDIENTS:

10’x20’ swath of pizza

Another pizza to use as pepperonis on the pizza

Stuffed mushrooms

FYI the mushrooms are stuffed with smaller pizzas

Smuckers magic shell ice cream topping

Rolos

Coca-cola

3 bags gummy bears

Fondue

Caesar salad dressing

Wood chips (as a thickener)

Grenadine syrup

Butter-flour mixture

Pizza Pockets

1 sewing machine

1 sewing pattern for pants (size XXXL)

DIRECTIONS:

Mushrooms are a vegetable and there are definitely some mushrooms on that pizza so technically they are HEALTHY-style pizza pants. Take the really big pizza. Put all of the other ingredients on the pizza. Pour the coke on the pizza. Dip the pizza in the fondue, and resist eating it before you make it into pants, no cheating!!! Sew that pizza into pants using the machine and the pattern. Make sure to sew in some pockets so you can keep a few extra spare Pizza Pockets in your pizza pockets!!!! Then eat your pants!!!!!!!!!!!

-

PAULA’S GUILT-FREE® TURTURTURDUCKDUCKENDUCKEN

INGREDIENTS:

3 turduckens

DIRECTIONS:

Stuff a turducken in a turducken in a turducken. While you’re waiting for it to cook, make your fat niece make you some pizza pants while you’re watching Pawn Stars and eat your pants and then slap your niece.

-

INSULIN AU GRATIN

INGREDIENTS:

1 insulin shot

15 lbs. block of cheddar cheese

DIRECTIONS:

Bury insulin shot in cheese. When you’re going into a diabetic coma, just eat your way to the shot!! Eat the cheese fast or you’ll die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-

SPARKLING WATER

INGREDIENTS:

1 glass sparkling water

1 ham

DIRECTIONS:

Put ham in water.

Have a safe and healthy weekend. And try not to go into a food induced coma.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry that it takes South Park character knockoffs to bring Chaucer together for me.

Congratulations, sir, on ALMOST being a role model!

2. Speaking of smoking, Jesse and I have moved into a new, more drug filled life in the role of Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain.

Actually, we went smoke-free to our friend Kaitlyn’s birthday party which was a ridiculously fun time. (Don’t judge it by the looks on our faces, we were in character!!) I loooove themed parties and we have another Trailer Park themed one this weekend. I am obviously going to go pregnant and missing a few teeth.

3. I am training with the Cross Country team again! It feels good to be back and injury free (ish). Last night I went to practice and my friend and I sprinted around Waterloo Park which is surprisingly beautiful in the dark and cold of January. I am settling into a more realistic workout schedule this term. Instead of running copious amounts every day of the week, I am swimming, running, biking, cross country skiing, body flowing and weight training on alternating days of the week. Here’s hoping I can emerge into the spring racing season as an uninjured beastly force of athletic power!

If I watch a movie during the day, I get restless and quit after about 15 minutes of watching. If I watch a movie at night, I fall asleep. And I hate watching anything twice.

My problem is, I am a nerd. I would rather be reading. In consequence, my family is not surprised if I bring a book upstairs to the loft and read away while they watch their CSI or something. It’s family time!!!

But there is one movie that I love. One that I will watch again and again. It only gets funnier, more relatable and amazing every time. And my mother agrees.

My mother and I adore the movie Julie and Julia.

 Laugh if you want. Many people have. We follow the movie with the devoutness of some LOTR or Harry Potter or even Twilight fans. We were discussing recently why exactly we love it so much…for one, we both love and I mean LOVE to cook. Over the holidays I went buck wild and cooked like a mad woman. I made gluten free pies from scratch, gluten free cinnamon rolls, beet and goat cheese stacks, chicken and mushroom sauce, flaxseed pizza with goat cheese and smoked salmon…you get the picture.
Another reason is that Julia Child is our sense of humour.

Her larger than life presence, vivacity, and creativity appeal to us both and we quote lines to each other and double over in laughter while others look on in pained or patient silence.

So with a love of a movie to this magnitude, we decided to have a Julie and Julia party for two. Emphasis on two, my dad and Megan fled the scene and found pressing matters to be looked after outside of the house.

And I made bruschetta.

If you have watched the movie, you know the scene where Julie is frying bruschetta in a pan. As Megan wisely said “Watching Julie and Julia without good food is like watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory without chocolate. It cannot be done.”

Nothing screams wisdom like a balloon hat

So we settled into the loft for a delightful afternoon of laughing and a few rounds of bruschetta. I sat through the whole thing, didn’t have a book in site, and didn’t fall asleep once.

Me in what Megan and her friends like to call my nerd glasses. Whatever woman, you wear a balloon on your head...

Bon Appétit!!!

Let’s talk resolutions. I have always been a resolution maker. In past years, I have had an extensive process I go through that can last me until February until I have properly reflected on the past year and made my goals for the New Year. Now, even I can see that is ridiculous so I have given up the habit in the last few years but living the year with intention is very important to me.

It is also important to me that I make the RIGHT resolutions. Meaningful, achievable and something that actually means something. I never make health or diet resolutions because I am pretty solid on that front and I try to steer clear of achievement goals as well because I have an issue with wanting to do everything, trying to do everything and driving myself mad. So, nothing health, education, career or financial oriented.

So what is left?

Here are my resolutions for 2012:

1. To live out the order of priorities that I scrawled in the front of my planner last semester on a particularly stressful day:

• 1. Family (always)
• 2. School
• 3. Athletics

2. To be grateful. What will I have tomorrow morning if I only wake up to what I thanked God for the day before?

3. To be a 1 Thessalonians 4 Christian: To not live life with “a dogged religious plod, but in a living, spirited dance”.

4. And finally, to remember that the people in my life are beautiful and to hold them close everyday and laugh, apologize, talk and say “I love you.”

(Bliss Connect Challenge #4)

Today in the lunchroom at work, there was a bowl of strawberries left over from a staff potluck this week and they had seen better days.

I announced this to my dad, and he remarked “Well, it is a pretty good metaphor for Christmas 2011.”

I agree.

See, last night, we received word that one of our staff members and his family were in a serious accident  and were t-boned by a drunk driver at the intersection just outside of our store. His eleven year old son is in critical condition and doctors are saying there is nothing they can do. Right before Christmas. Right before what would have been the birthday of their eldest son who was killed in a tragic car accident in March this year.

The article on the accident can be read here: http://www.therecord.com/news/local/article/643846–young-boy-critically-injured-several-others-hurt-in-crash

I feel like anything I can say regarding my Christmas is merely whining compared to what these dear people are experiencing. And we are reeling as a staff team and community to find a way to come alongside them and support them. There are no words. But the way that we have chosen to support them is to raise money for the expenses of their trips to Hamilton, purchase of a new vehicle and all the other costs that tragedy can bring. CTV is announcing tonight that we are accepting donations at our store (Wellesley Home Hardware) but if you are unable to make it, consider sending a request for their address so you can send aid directly.

And send a prayer on their behalf.

You are all such a support to our family and we cannot thank you enough. There certainly were tears shed to feel such a caring community around us.

***

I mentioned a few posts prior that I am taking part in the Bliss Connect Challenge over the holidays to keep me writing. It is a different topic every week and this week’s is on the health/wellness item that tops my list this year.

Well. I am a little biased in my wish because I know I am getting it but no matter.

The top of my list is a pair of cross country skis.

I am a cross country and trail runner. I love darting through the forest and uneven ground, climbing rocks and mountain biking. So Jesse decided that the best thing to get me for Christmas was a pair of cross country skis so I can continue darting through the forest even when there is snow on the ground. (I am glad he needed to tell me beforehand to get me fitted or else Christmas could have been a lopsided fiasco.)

So I found myself being bombarded with questions like “steel edge or no”? “cork?” “one of those bar things that attach your boot to your bindings or two?” (They didn’t really ask that last one, I just forget what it is called). I just blinked at them and let Jesse field the questions.

So I am completely and utterly thrilled to be getting them because I love snow, cross country anything and Jesse so this sort of encapsulates the whole thing into one present.

Merry Christmas indeed.

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